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Thursday, February 18, 2010

Infidelity


 
I don't pry.  I don't eavesdrop.  But when I'm sitting behind someone who is loud, obnoxious and opinionated, well, all bets are off.  Especially if there is a thirty year age difference and the older of the two, the man, is trying to impress the ingenue with his sophisticated version of modern relationships.

"Did the word actually come from 'infidel'," he asks?  How absurd to use such an archaic, tribal connotation and apply it to today's standards.  People are not monogamous by nature.  Why criticize a natural impulse and then assign blame?"

"I'm rethinking my priorities.  My wife is involved with the grandchildren and heads several charitable organizations, which of course, someone in our position should do.  I encourage that.  But, it leaves very little time for her to accompany me on the longer business trips I have to take."

At this point, they got up to leave and I didn't get to hear if the young lady was taken in by the speel or not.  She didn't seem that gullible.

Listen, honey.  If I were 35 years younger, I know how I'd handle it.  It would go something like this....

................and I can play this game too


We probably look like this and I do look fabulous, don't I?  You just look a little silly.  I'm wearing a designer dress you paid for, so I'll put up with it.  By the way, I'll need lots of those.  A new wardrobe every season.  It takes a lot of effort to look like this, you know. 














This dress would look perfect with sparkly diamonds to set it off.  And I just love blue boxes with white satin ribbons.  You will have to surprise me lots of those!


Showing all this skin can be chilly so I'll need several of these in different lengths.  You wouldn't want me to catch cold, would you?









Oh!  I could pick you up for lunch or drop you off at the airport whenever you want with one of these.  And I need transportation to get to the spa and hairdressers.  After all, I want to look pretty for you.  Isn't Bentley a wonderful name for a car?


Well, I need something to put my keys in after all!  Just a few of these in colors to match my shoes.









OOPS!!  You caught me!  Well, why bring up all that business about infidelity and start assigning blame?  After all, monogamous relationships are so outdated.  Thanks for all the goodies.  No, he doesn't give me gifts.  He doesn't have to.   Look at him!!!!  I really prefer someone my own age.  Oh, I sent a video to your wife so that she would know what to do with you.   


                                       
Bye, Bye, now.

5 comments:

  1. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

    i'm on the floor! but linda (giggle giggle), honest to god, and not because of my sexual preference, i couldn't. not for any of this.

    not even in the dark.

    :)

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  2. Nor could I kj, but it IS the perfect retribution isn't it!

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  3. Well, as always through human history, infidelity is a two sided sword. Males are studs and females are wh*res. Thanks for a delightful post.

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  4. I was just speaking to this issue on another blog and couldn't believe that double standard is still so alive and well. See Susie of Arabia and her Valentine's Day Massacre post.

    Thanks for stopping by.

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  5. The way u presented this post is really very good.

    ReplyDelete